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Deep down it starts to stir.
Flashbacks. Reliving those Flashbacks.
It starts to wind me up inch by inch.
Suffocating any other thoughts.
Shake off that feeling. Keep shaking off that feeling.
There are plenty of distractions.
and I dance with those distractions
then my head hits the pillow.
The flood gates open and I let it pour out of me.
I reach out but it’s always so cold.
I’m damned if I do, and I’m damned if I don’t.
Thank god for good friends
Thank god for the people who have held my hand
held my hand for two years
braved this storm.
Those who saw beauty when I could only see a disaster
The waiting is what I need to purge myself of
This isn’t a movie
You won’t show up at my door
There is no light you will see
There is no light that will ever lead you to me
You are trying to break me like a bad habit
Rid yourself of whatever desire drew you to me time
and time again
Your leaving and taking no survivors
Burning everything to the ground.
Setting Every Memory on Fire.
That’s not what love is.
No great love story has this chapter.
not this much pain
not this much pain over and over
There I go again
Letting all of my feelings start bubbling over