..why is it so hard for us to see the beauty within ourselves.. Why do we settle believing we are undeserving.. Why do we compromise.. And compromise… Tying ourselves to the complacency.. Watching happiness skip by our house and visit the neighbors… Why do we never feel good enough.. Striving for more everyday… Every imperfection out shining every sliver of beauty..
Why do I settle for someone unloving, undeserving of my love, why do I settle for slanders and interactions that never amount to anything. One night stands with you. One night stands like poison coming out of my mouth, drilled down to the most insignificant nights of all nights in the history of Love, if we could get any lower you would take us there I’m sure.
Why do I still linger when I know my heart isn’t where it used to be. Hours pass and not one thought of you crosses my mind. Hours…I never thought I would see the day… Hours when your name wouldn’t cross my mind. So what is it that I’m scared of?
Maybe I’m hard to love, maybe I have to many screws loose and not enough trust in the male race. Maybe I’m damaged. Maybe I don’t know what I want. Maybe there isn’t someone out there for me, who could put up with me. Maybe I’m born to run, but I want to be tied down. Maybe I’m just conflicted.
Yeah that’s most definitely it.